Thursday, March 25, 2010

 Samantha Hardin
Payton
First person
Cancer

    I am a cancer survivor! I have had cancer in my left knee since I was six. I am thirteen now.  I have fought a lot in my life, and I have had four surgeries. The doctors thought that I would have only lived for another year or so. I showed them wrong. Although I have had many hard years the cancer is gone, I am back at school like any old thirteen year old would be as happy as ever.
      I have been cancer free for 6 months now! It feels amazing to not be on crutches or in a wheel chair preparing for a rough next few weeks after a big surgery. I have been able to act like any old ordinary thirteen year old. The thing that I like most about being cancer free is, the fact that you don’t have to go to a hospital every three weeks for chemotherapy.  My hair is almost to my shoulders it has been forever since I have complained that the wind is blowing my hair in my face. It feels amazing!
    This feeling did not last long though!
     April 31st, 2009 I go into the doctors with a really bad pain in my knee.  Due to my cancer in the past, they immediately made me get an MRI. When the doctor came in my heart skipped a beat I think that my parents did too. All I was thinking was what if it is the cancer again. I was scared to death. When the words came out of the doctor’s mouth “I am sorry to say but the cancer is back.” I started crying. My mom held me for three hours that night before I fell fast asleep.
     As I woke up the next morning I found myself in a hospital room. A breathing tube and many tubes surrounded me. My mom and dad both were at my bedside. Their eyes both blood shot red I could tell that we had been here for a while.  When the doctor came in my mom started to cry. My mom doesn’t cry unless something really bad is going on. I was worried to find out why I was here so early in the morning. “How are you doing?” asked the doctor. “I feel ok I guess.” I explained to the doctor. He was an old man he had grey hair and a grey prickly beard. I have known him since I was six when the cancer had appeared. I knew I could ask him anything.
     “Why am I here right now?” I asked.      “Last night you stopped breathing,” explained the doctor “your parents called 911 at around three in the morning. We put you on a breathing indicator and so far you are doing just fine we are going to keep you here for about a week and while you are here get your chemo started.” explained the doctor.
     As they put the chemo in my arm my mom held my hand like she always did when they put the shot in me. I hated shots. I know that might be hard to believe, and maybe you might think that I have gotten over my phobia about shots, having to have one go in me every three weeks I haven’t. I hate them. As my palms got clammy the chemo went into my system. I knew that I would not have hair in a few weeks. I hated wearing those awful wigs. I was dreading the coming of these next few weeks.
May 13, 2009 was the day that all my hair came out. It was very sad seeing a very smooth and shinny baldhead again thank goodness people have created wigs. Although they are annoying you gotta love them. I have two wigs one that I wear as wavy hair like when you take two French braids out of your hair in the morning, and one wig that I can play around with. Last week I went to the doctors we planned the date for my fifth and hopefully final surgery. It will be on June 19 the day after the last day of school. I will go in at 8:00 in the morning and have the surgery at 12:00 the surgery will be over by at least 2:00. I am dreading the day.
June 19, 2009 the day of my surgery has finally arrived we walked into the hospital by eight I am starving I haven’t gotten to have anything since last night. I won’t be put under until 11:30 but they still don’t want me to eat anything. I am very tired I couldn’t fall asleep for more than ten minutes last night due to thinking about the surgery. I am scare dif you can’t tell. Its 11:30 now the nurse tells me to think of something happy. I think of Ice cream at fist due to my growling stomach but then I start to think about my friends and what they are doing how the real first day of summer is supposed to be. As the IV goes through my system I began to fall into a deep sleep. As I dream I see my best friend Alie and me right by her side we are at her house it’s a beautiful warm summer day you can hear the birds chirping and I can feel the water against my skin as Alie splashes me. We are having a great time. I notice that my hair is back past my shoulders. I think of this dream as the reality when I have recovered from all my surgery.
     It has been about three hours now and I am just starting to wake up from the surgery, everything is blurry and I can feel the beads of sweat running down my face.  The funny thing was I didn’t feel any pain, almost like nothing was even there.  I didn’t want to look down at my leg thinking that something must have gone wrong with it. As I bear to look I slowly pick up my head. I see that from my knee below has disappeared. I rub my eyes thinking that maybe this as a hallucination. It wasn’t.
     As the doctor explained what happened I noticed that I had stopped crying all I was thinking of was that the cancer is at least gone. I thought in my mind that I would rather be able to have no leg and not have to worry about cancer and if the breath that I have just taken is going to be my last one.



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